Finally, someone has figured out how to stop spilling tea all over the place! These fluid flow geniuses in France have published a treatise on the "teapot effect" in Physical Review Letters. The so-called "teapot effect" is "the annoying tendency for a liquid to trickle down the outside of a receptacle after pouring."

I, for one, am relieved and immensely impressed.

Apparently there are two big issues at hand; the first is flow separation. When a fluid starts moving more slowly it begins to separate from itself, making it more likely that it will spill onto your pantaloons. The second factor is the hydrophobicity of the teapot—or whatever vessel you are serving your liquid of choice in. Teapot makers have long tried to build the perfect spout by altering the physical shape and size, but what they should have been doing is using a highly hydrophobic material for construction.

I think this would be best represented by a teapot made of lotus leaves—in this way an homage is made to Chinese culture, who also happen to love tea and grow the lotus plant.

What's that you say? Making a teapot out of a leaf is absurd? Ok, ok, you win... we'll make the teapot out of butter... butter's hydrophobic, right?